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Turn Me Back Into the Man I Was When We Met, I Was Happier Then With No Mind-Set Holy crap on crappy crap craps! Has it really been MONTHS since I've updated this thing? I guess part of growing up includes paying your taxes and abandoning your blogs. Kind of sad when you think about it. So what have I been up to, I can hear all three of you who still read this asking. Well, mostly work. This damned California place isn't cheap and... it's pretty tough staying afloat. I've been working steadily for the past few months though editing porn, so that's good... I guess. Kind of makes Christmas conversations with the parents awkward. "So what movies did you work on recently?" "Well... we had this really interesting foreign film called, 'French Fanny Fist-Fuckers 5'" *Mother passes out into the mashed potatoes while father fakes a heart attack* Anyway... other than that... I've got the podcast thingy that I do on occasion. And there are other little various projects that keep me busy... Other podcasts, my first novel (Which I'm really close to finishing, I swear), and then there's "The Geek Report." What, you ask, is "The Geek Report"? Allow me to show you:
Episode 3: So yeah... still plenty to keep me busy. That, and this new hobby I have. I like to go down to Hollywood and single out one homeless guy. I'll go up to him, and hand him a quarter. I'll make sure he clearly sees it's me handing him a quarter. Then I will follow him for about five minutes, then I'll go up and ask if I could borrow a quarter from him. I will continue to do this until one of two things happens:1.) The homeless person will get wise to my ruse and beat the unholy shit out of me. or... 2.) They break down and weep like small children. If they do the second one, I usually buy them a turkey dinner. I'm not a completely heartless bastard... even though I have no love in my life. Well... I do... but it's all self-inflicted, much like my many stab wounds. Okay, I'm off to write another chapter in my book and then I'm going to masturbate inside of a balloon, then fill it up with helium and set it free in the hopes that it makes it to Beverly Hills and impregnates Lindsay Lohan. That oughta fuck up that bitches career permanently. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! TASTE MY TAINTED SEED, LOHAN, AND KNOW TRUE EVIL! Seriously, I need a girlfriend. I'm accepting applications. |