Every once in a while, we here at Fucktitles like to have certain themes and ideas pop up repeatedly in our entries. These themes can include such little things as "Indiana drivers are fucking idiots" or "Steve got into an embarassing situation and now he's going to tell you all about it" or "boobies." And since we like to keep our avid readers happy (both of them), we've decided to bring back a character that seemed to have struck a chord with the viewers.

Ladies and gentlemen (And Wes), I present to you: THE RETURN OF THE FUCKBOT!!!! (For a brief refresher, this is what the Fuckbot is.)

Just a couple of notes before I start though. As always, the culprit of this adventure will remain anonymous. She will only be identified by the initials MF, either because those are her initials, or it reminds me of muthafucka.... And I've met some pretty damn sexy mutha's in my lifetime.

Also, this happens to be one of the few times that a girl actually went along with the Fuckbot thing... so just to warn you: THE FOLLOWING CONTAINS EXPLICIT MATERIAL NOT SUITABLE FOR CHILDREN UNDER THE AGE OF 56! IF YOU ARE UNDER THE AGE OF 56, YOU NEED TO CALL YOUR MOMMY INTO THE ROOM AND HAVE HER READ IT FOR YOU! THAT IS ALL!

Enjoy.

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Fuckbot: I am the Fuckbot Version 8.23253256734634624523 and a half.

Fuckbot: I am here to serve your every need.

Fuckbot: (bows)

Fuckbot: Domi origato.

MF: wow do u have a 12" vibrating metal cock?

Fuckbot: (searches database for the word cock)

Fuckbot: I am sorry. Fuckbot does not come equipped with metallic poultry. Please rephrase question.

MF: uh, can i borrow $20?

Fuckbot: I am sorry. Fuckbot does not give loans. In fact, Fuckbot requires money to perform his duties. Please insert 25 cents into the open slot.

MF: (inserts 25 cents)

Fuckbot: Wrong slot!

MF: oh sorry

MF: there we go

MF: right slot

MF: i see

Fuckbot: (whizzes and whirs)

MF: lol

Fuckbot: Please enter command....

MF: give me money

MF: please

Fuckbot: Fuckbot is not an ATM. Please enter command....

MF: give me male penis

Fuckbot: (searches database for "male penis")

Fuckbot: (a mechanical rod slowly slips from Fuckbot’s metallic codpiece)

Fuckbot: Please specify length...

MF: how about 10

Fuckbot: Setting penis mode to "Ron Jeremy..."

Fuckbot: (mechanical whirring as Fuckbot's penis elongates to 10 inches)

MF: insert to moist wet spot

Fuckbot: (begins chasing the cat)

Fuckbot: (catches the cat, but the cat starts clawing Fuckbot)

MF: no fuckbot!

Fuckbot: (Fuckbot laughs, as he is made out of metal)

MF: nooooooooooo!!1

Fuckbot: Command cancelled.

Fuckbot: Please enter new command...

Fuckbot: ........

Note: There was about a five minute pause here.

Fuckbot: Fuckbot will go into auto shut down in 10 seconds....

Fuckbot: 9....

Fuckbot: 8.....

Fuckbot: 7..........

Fuckbot: 6.......

Fuckbot: 5.........

Fuckbot: 4............

Fuckbot: 3..........

Fuckbot: 2...........

Fuckbot: 1............

MF: wait

MF: stop

Fuckbot: Auto shut down cancelled.

Fuckbot: Please enter new command....

MF: eh, write me an english paper on my childhood

Fuckbot: Fuckbot is a machine which serves one purpose, and one purpose only.

Fuckbot: Fuckbot serves as a sexual tool for the lonely and deprived....

Fuckbot: Please enter new command....

MF: ok fuck me

Fuckbot: Command accepted...

Fuckbot: Please specify request...

MF: come again?

Fuckbot: Please specify request....

MF: uh, fuck me in the ass

Fuckbot: Request accepted....

Fuckbot: (grabs you by the hips, turns you around, and begins thrusting against your ass)

Fuckbot: (Fuckbot stops)

MF: oh yeah.....

Fuckbot: Request cannot be completed...

MF: what happened

Fuckbot: Fuckbot cannot penetrate clothing.

MF: why not fuck bot?

Fuckbot: It chafes Fuckbot's willy.

MF: your metal

MF: u can go through the clothing

Fuckbot: Fuckbot only takes specific requests.

Fuckbot: If you wish for Fuckbot to rip off your clothing with his "teeth" you may request so...

MF: lol

MF: ok i want you to rip my clothing off with your teeth and then proceed to fuck me in the ass

Fuckbot: Disclamer: Fuckbot is not repsonsible, nor will compensate, for any ripped, damaged, or tattered clothing, body parts, or small animals.

Fuckbot: Command accepted.

Fuckbot: ....

Fuckbot: (leans down and puts your shirt between his teeth, then yanks his head to the side)

Fuckbot: (the shirt rips freely as Fuckbot tosses it aside)

Fuckbot: (Fuckbot then grabs your pants, and tears them off with his teeth as well, holding onto your waist, making sure you do not fall)

Fuckbot: (Fuckbot then leans forward, grabs your panties into his teeth)

MF: go fuckbot go!

Fuckbot: (He tears them off with a simple yank, but accidentally swallows them and starts choking)

Fuckbot: (Fuckbot clutches at it's throat, trying to scream for help)

MF: Heimlich!

MF: i gots ya fuckbot

Fuckbot: (Fuckbot, using fast thinking, flips on the "Kick Me" sign on his back)

MF: (i kick the sign)

Fuckbot: (coughs up the panties)

Fuckbot: (Fuckbot also grows 5 more inches, unbeknownst to him)

Fuckbot: Fuckbot thanks you.

MF: welcome fuckbot

Fuckbot: (opts to rip your bra off with his hands instead, then grabs your hips)

MF: now go back to work bitch!

Fuckbot: (flips you around, and sizes you up)

Fuckbot: (Fuckbot’s “penis” tip flies open, and simple lubricant sprays out onto your backside)

Fuckbot: (Fuckbot rubs it down, making sure he doesn't miss a spot)

MF: wait stop fuckbot

Fuckbot: Command aborted.

MF: new command

Fuckbot: Waiting...

MF: i want you to take my precious flower away

Fuckbot: (Fuckbot moves over to your window sill, grabbing a potted plant)

Fuckbot: (tosses it out the window)

MF: no not that fuckbot

Fuckbot: Awaiting new command...

MF: i want u to take my virginity

MF: do it bitch

Fuckbot: Command.....

Fuckbot: Accepted..

MF: go to work!

Fuckbot: Please specify request.... "Postion..."

MF: uh, let's go with handcuffed spread eagle

MF: then 5 mins later

MF: doggy style

MF: hell yeah!

MF: now start

Fuckbot: Command accepted....

Fuckbot: (walks over to you, picks you up, carries you to the bed, and plops you down onto it)

Fuckbot: (grabs a set of handcuffs and begins to handcuff your right hand to the bed)

Fuckbot: (takes your left hand, and handcuffs that to the bed as well)

Fuckbot: (leans down, spreading your legs)

MF: hand cuff em

MF: do it

Fuckbot: (one finger elongates a little, slides it into you, then pulls it out, checking the wetness, like one would check the oil of a car)

Fuckbot: (Satisfied, Fuckbot nods, then slowly positions his mechanical shaft between your legs)

MF: thrust!

Fuckbot: (Fuckbot thrusts forward once, ejaculates, then passes out on top of you)

Fuckbot: (Fuckbot starts snoring)

MF: reboot!

MF: reboot!

Fuckbot: Program shut down..

Fuckbot: bleep bloop, fzzirrrrrrrrrrrrr….